Well started back at weight watchers a new program comming out so all excitment, sounds good we will see!!!! 16th dec we get the new material an it's our xmas break up for the year, all in all a lovely night!!! Bummer with ttom i had a 1 kg gain, go home do tea try to get abbey to eat she has been sick all day an asleep, wake her she won't eat or drink, then about 20 mins later she comes out of her room, lays on the lounge an starts to take a fit, i call kelvin the kids are all crying an upset, now she stopps breathing, omg so we run her to the hospitial
as we get there she starts, thank god is all i can say!!!! Lucky my sister got down today so i can get her to drive me over, as she has to go to bundy and only one of us can go, i get kelvin to so i can get my sister to run me home an pack us all some stuff, bye the time i get to the hospitial she is crying for her numy(dummy as we call it!!!) Lucky i had one in her dora bag!!!!i got her pj's an drink cups an all that, well my sister did!!!!Packed the kids around to my mums, so i can tell them she is ok, as they are all still very upset!!!! My mind was racing thinking how close it was to my dads aniversary, an how my cousin went through all he did, i only had the smallest glimspe an it scared the hell out of me, but we where very lucky an she is fine, just a ferbile convolustion, have to watch as she may do it again, OMG i hope not!!!! But she is ok me i spent the next week or so a mess stressing out watching her sleep touching her to make sure she was ok!!! Then the other kids started getting the temps so looking after them, didn't make it to the next weeks weigh in, but i know i have put on i can feel it!!!
XMAS CAME AND WENT
AND YES I'M STILL PICKING
AND NO I HAVEN'T WEIGHED IN YET
BUT I KNOW I HAVE PUT ON
I CAN FEEL IT!!!!!!
As if this month couldn't get any worse well it has, but as bad as it made me feel it has made me feel much more stronger and i'm hoping incontrol!!!! I got all i wanted and more for xmas a lovely ring from kelvin, a new camera, books and bits and pieces muma mia movie which he girls and i love!!!! a new mp3 player to get me motivated with my exercise!!!!
AND THE NUMBER 1 THING I WANTED A WII AND WII FIT!!!!!
Well usually i hide my weight from kelvin and the kids, but i decided not too today we all did our profile on the wii fit, of course they where all in the ideal section, me i was the bit as high as it would go obese, i just stood on there an cried i felt so horrible, i felt so yuck i have never felt so bad before, cause i have always hid it!!!! But now i have to admit it an make sure that this time next year i'm out of that obese section!!! i know i didn't get this big overnight an i know that with starting with 60kgs it will take me 2 -3 years to loose it, not like i have been beating myself up for doing so crap some weeks, but hey the muscle has to make the weight loss look slower, but i would rather it be slow an help me be not so flabby well lets hope so, so like i said what a year i sure felt today like i hit rock bottom, so i weigh in tommorrow the first time in 2 weeks so i will see the verdict!!!! But like i said here's hoping 2009 will be a better year!!!!!
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